bipolar disorder. I hate it. With a passion. I just wish I could make up my f*cking mind whether to be happy, sad, or somewhere in between. The overly happy (manic) times are great. I gut a butt load of work done and my blog is really creative. Depression on the other hand, sucks royal monkey butt. I've been trying to write something for the last hour and a half and its just not effing coming out the way I want it to. Its like I can't remember anything to save my life, but I feel this pervasive blech that only happens with really craptacular relationships. I would love to be able to go and read akatiegirl's blog on her engagement to the man of her dreams again, but all it does is depress me and make my writing stink all the more. I've been like this for the last day and a half, which means its going to be one of the effing long depressed periods again. I hate those the most. I can live with a day or so. They suck, but they're doable. But anything over that and I'm curled up in the fetal position in the corner of my room praying to God to just make it all go away by day 3. And they usually last about a week and a half. Go effing figure...
Comments (6)
I'm sorry:( If it's any consolation, I've posted another depressing blog about the Dragon...
Ah, but then I realized you'd already read it and commented, no less. Well, still...
I hope you feel better soon. I'm sorry you're having to go through this
-Katie
*hug*
I know. I'll PM you.
If you want to try to write something, try this. What you're feeling at this moment, refine it to one word. Write that word down. Then let related words or thoughts cascade down from it. Don't fight the maelstrom, let yourself sink into it, and the pathos can fuel your writing. Being BP gives you a lot of fuel to crank out really good writing.
@akatiegirl - no worries. Its not your fault. I'm just having issues. The last Dragon post helped though, so thanx a bunch for that one...
@the_last_kiss - I'll try that tomorrow. For now, my brain is telling me its time to go to bed...
I feel bad for you having to go through this, and me not having anything to say to make you feel better, but... I support you, regardless, and am hoping you start feeling better about... anything and everything. Maybe that will help you just a bit, maybe not. ...I try...
@singnelise - thank you, I appreciate it more than you know. Today has been better, but thats because I've purposely kept myself busy, so we'll see how the rest of the day goes.